Slow down, prepare

I must apoligize, even to myself. I have been getting really behind on writing. I want to keep up with this because I really feel it is important so I can get honest, see the "real" me and work towards my goals-weight loss, health and getting RAW. I feel as though the last week or so life has been swirling around like a merry-go-round and I can't get off. I'm not sad, or angry, or even wore out, just spinning around with a feeling of needing to slow down. Last night I laid down to bed much earlier than I ever do and I was OUT pretty quickly. I don't remember taking off my glasses or putting down my book or anything. Goes to show me, I can go and go and go but I really need to slow down and give my body some rest! I have also discovered that the more cooked, processed, sugary foods I eat, the less patience, focus and tolerance I have.
So, what I am learning is that there is more to eating raw than eating raw.
What is it that I want, what is the total picture of going raw. What is my goal-for eating and for emotional change?
Food for Sun 6.24.06
1 1/2 C coffee w/ vanilla creamer
1 biscuit
1/2 apple, 1/2 banana*
lg handful of soaked/sprouted/dehydrated nuts and seeds*
sm handful macadamia nuts*
16.9 oz water
16oz juice: celery/cucumber/carrot/apple/parsley/cilantro
8 cho chip cookies
7 potato chips
3"x1" piece of PB fudge
1 1/2 C stuffing
1/2 C ice cream
16.9 oz water
pepermint tea
van yogurt granola bar
I just felt like I was eating out of bordom, and the food was doing nothing at all for me.

Food for Mon. 6.25.07
1/2 C coffee w/ van creamer
red grapes*
2 soft tacos w/ beans/lettuce*/tomato*/ guacamole*/salsa*
16.9 oz water
handful seeds*
handful almonds*
16.9 oz water
banana*
sm handful popcorn
1/2 c vanilla soy ice cream
5 steak fries
1/2 c wild rice w/ flax oil and dulse
1/2 avocado*
2 baby portabella mushrooms*
16.9 oz water